Tuesday, 19 February 2013

Thoughts On Peyronie's and Sexuality

I remember seeing a PD forum post many moon ago that sparked a bit of a debate. A gay man posted that he wanted to speak with other gay peyronie's disease sufferers. The reaction from some was "why can't you speak to the group at large about it?", though others had a more nuanced view. The former is a perfectly valid point, but with the challenges that peyronie's disease brings I think it's important to try to put ourselves in everyone's shoes to create the optimal environment with regard to treatment and mental health. Just as a woman's perspective will be different from a man's (hence why there are some women orientated boards) a gay man's viewpoint could be slightly different to a straight man's depending on his individual circumstances.

Of course with regard to general treatment options it wouldn't be, that would be the same across the board. There are finer points to consider though. Some gay men may feel more comfortable discussing sexual matters together than part of a wider group. That's likely true of heterosexual men too. There may be a tendancy to want to try to avoid conflict with other's world views and so forth. Typically this may be something that could be thrashed out in public, but we have to bear in mind that often men seeking help for peyronie's disease are at a very low ebb as it is, and so are looking for an environment where they do not have to validate themselves on additional levels.

Another aspect to consider is that two gay men with peyronie's disease could potentially form a relationship together. As with any peyronie's sufferer the extent of their curvature and pain would dictate how sexually active they could be, but still it's a point worth raising. Where two people in a relationship have exactly the same health problem it's clearly a somewhat different situation to where one has a problem that the partner appreciates, but can't truly understand, or at the very least is not physically attached to. Also, what is sexually activity to one person, may be different to another. Sexual roles for instance. I certainly feel that it would be unlikely for gay men to openly discuss such matters on public forums without there being some kind of negative reaction on occasion.

It ranges from difficult to impossible to put a number on how many men actually suffer from peyronie's disease. It's very possible that there may not even be a demand for a gay specific peyronie's forum, but maybe a sub board on an existing board, who knows? Having peyronie's disease isn't exactly something that people advertise far and wide (try looking up 'peyronie's disease' on billion + member facebook, and see how very few men are 'out' about their PD) and so it would appear that if any of these concerns are to be met, it's unlikely that would happen outside of a PD community environment.

This whole post may come across as a bit 'niche within a niche', but realistically peyronie's disease is an adopted minority status in some sense. One that brings with it a whole host of unique and challenging problems - let's not forget that gay men were specifically excluded from certain Xiaflex clinical trials. If we appreciate that, it's also important for us to realise that all men dealing with this issue, gay and straight, deserve to be able to make the very best of a bad situation without additional hurdles along the way.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thank you for your insightful message. I am a gay man with peyronies, and I have not spoken to anyone about my condition! It would be nice to have feed back from my own peer group, for support and first hand knowledge of what I am going through. It has been a year since my diagnoses and I have been using the stretcher,(not so much) I did Vit E until I almost overdosed and other herbs. I had a period where I had erection difficulties, but I fixed that with L-Arginine, L-carnitine, gingo, and ginger ect....

Richard Wagner said...

thank you for your thoughtful post. i really appreciate it. i too have peyronie's disease. i'd very much like to discuss this with others. perhaps we can take some of our discussion to my sex advice website: http://www.drdicksexadvice.com/
— richard

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